Rest

"Come to me all ye who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest..."

After talking with a good friend from Perth, I remembered what my former predicatement was, and am very glad to be over it. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, and why I could only get 3 or 5 hours of sleep a night, and be more energetic than a team of energizer bunnys at the superbowl. These days I don't have illusions of grandeur or the need to talk quickly. My thoughts are slowly collecting and going back to a moderate tempo.

I don't take sleeping for granted and regularly take an afternoon nap. I just get drowsy from time to time and can't keep my eyes open. This is a much better problem to have, than the other extreme last year (being awake and constantly thinking). I've also been having some vivid dreams, which is a really good sign that I'm actually getting the rest that I need.

For now, I've put all my future plans and career goals to the side. It's probably better that I get well first before making important decisions. I've heard the phrase "Have you considered" followed by a career, or occupational suggestions several times from friends and family. There's nothing wrong with being helpful, but for a manic depressive, trust me, I've thought about almost everything. Thinking isn't the problem. Not thinking is what I'm after, or perhaps thinking about only one thing at a time. Simple does not always mean sinful after all. My life has been greatly reduced, and it's a good thing. Eventually, I will carry on functioning, but for now, I need to take things slow and easy.