endurance

"1. The fact or power of enduring an unpleasant or difficult process or situation without giving way."-Oxford American Dictionaries

Not to be too dramatic, but I've definitely been learning what endurance means lately. I'm amazed that I managed to pass my Math class this semester, especially since it was the third attempt. I was able to spend more time on my studies than hanging out with friends during this time, and I think that had a positive correlation with my grades.

Right now, I'm sitting in the reality of being just one semester away from my A.A. degree. Just two more classes and it's all over. I'm taking the summer off from school, since it doesn't look like I have any financial aid coming. Also, I've decided to give music lessons while looking for gainful employment. That way I'm still using all my resources and not just hoping that doors will open.

"Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance.."
-Hebrews 10:35-36

I read this the other day, and I see these things as connected. If you have confidence, then you endurance. If you have endurace, then you have confidence. I think of endure as "push through". We need to "hang on" to confidence, and we need to "push through" difficulty.

"...so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise:"
-Hebrews 10:36

It's not about blind confidence, there has to be something that tests that confidence. If I'm running in a race, and I decide to cheat by cutting corners, taking car rides, and such, will I make it to the finish line? Sure. Will I be confident? Of course. But will I be awarded with a prize? No, I'll be disqualified.
Why? Because I didn't run all the way, I didn't compete fairly and openly, and I didn't learn how to "push through".

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize."
-2 Corinthians 9:24

I'm learning that if I opt out of some situations, I may be pushing away, instead of pushing through. Before I left Canada, I was just so refreshed and wanted so badly to stay there, but as I was reading the Word the Lord told me to go back home and finish my degree. Now that I'm home I want so badly to go, and the Lord tells me again from His Word to stay and finish.

This was the verse that jumped out at me.

"However, if you say, 'We will not stay in this land,' and so disobey the LORD your God, and if you say, 'No, we will go and live in Egypt, where we will not see war or hear the trumpet or be hungry for bread,' then hear the word of the LORD, O remnant of Judah. This is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says: 'If you are determined to go to Egypt and you do go to settle there, then the sword you fear will overtake you there, and the famine you dread will follow you into Egypt, and there you will die."-Jeremiah 41:13-16

I think it's interesting how the things the remnant of Judah was trying to avoid, were the exact same things that would nail them later on in Egypt. If you read verses 9-12, you'll see that God wants to work character and obedience in them despite all the circumstances around them. He also promises to love them, and have compassion on their situation. But the people so quickly "push away" God, rather than "push through" with God.

I wish I could say that I'm better than the remnant. I've made both good and bad choices over the past few years, but I keep coming back and asking God to help me push through. God is so good. He really is the leading authority on the subject.

God bless you, and may we all "run the race with endurance" and "in such a way as to win the prize."

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus"
-Romans 15:5